Birthday

For many people...
it's a special date to celebrate

the day we born to this world...
the day we become a son, a daughter, a child to our parent

for me, it's just another day
it's not a common thing in my family to celebrate our birthday
but it's a special thing for others...

so, i have no special greeting from both of my parents...
even my sibling...
i bet they don't even remember...
but i do remember theirs... but i never send wishes to them

why? i don't know... maybe i never had a birthday party since i was a kid
with my family
all of us never did actually...
maybe there is, but not that i could remember...
or...
maybe i was not there...

i do have small birthday parties before but mostly i celebrate it with friends
but not an annual event though...
if they remembers, then it will be celebrated
if not, it just a day for me to remember...
that i'm getting mature each year

thanks to FB, without your notifications
i may not even getting any wishes... maybe

but still, thanks to my friends for making some time sending beautiful wishes...
i really appreciate it.



i was born today, 29 years ago.
thanks mom, thanks dad.

thoughts

i feel like i'm getting insane each day
things that i love to do seems fading its attractions to me every day

i lost my passion...
i lost my interest towards everything

i don't know how i could regain my spirit once again?

Down

I think this time...
I reached the lowest point of my life...

I never thought that i feel so useless like this...
I never feel that i am alone like this...
like before, i still have family...
but now... seems like...
i'm on my own

i feel so empty...
i never feel like this before...

i think i can count on my finger how many times i smile, laughing so freely like before
none of it seems exist in my life now...

what i displayed to people were just fake...
deep down, God knows...